So, in an unapologetically selfish plea to the powers that be, I’ve laid out some simple requests for the future flavors sure to drop as part of whatever marketing stunt comes next.

But lately, it seems we’ve lost the thread in terms of what made these collaborations so invigorating, so exciting, so delightfully unserious in the first place. This whimsical approach to unexpected ice cream flavors isn’t new. And while some of these experiments have been surprisingly successful (looking at you, Kraft), many of them have haunted both my mind and stomach. However, ice cream has been going off the rails.įrom Jeni’s shortbread-inspired pints celebrating the premiere of Ted Lasso’s third season and Van Leeuwen’s onion-based Glass Onion monstrosity to trending flavors like ranch or Kraft macaroni and cheese, things have gotten more than a little weird in the dairy department. It’s basically a guaranteed crowd-pleaser.

It’s an ideal canvas for creative chefs and burgeoning entrepreneurs, a vehicle for unfamiliar flavor combinations, a welcome respite for even the pickiest eaters, and a soothing vessel of summertime and childhood nostalgia. Shockingly few things are as universally beloved and unproblematic as ice cream. Too often in human history (and in Jurassic Park), we ask ourselves, “Can we?” when the real question worth asking is, “Should we?” Little else embodies this sentiment better than what is currently the bane of my existence as a person with taste buds: the latest wave of attention-grabbing ice cream flavors and collaborations.

Laurens van leeuwen ice cream